Monday, June 11, 2018

Love Advice from Bagong Kuya

     Whaaatt'ssss uupppppp mga ka-chikaaaaaaaa!!! First of all I wanna say sorry dahil jusme 2 years pala akong nawala sa blogosperya at sorry kasi wala akong maibigay na excuse sa inyo kung bakit ganon.
Image from https://www.mickeyellison.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/2-years.png

Anyway, sobrang na-miss ko kayong readers ko. In fairness huh, may mga bumibisita pa rin pala sa blogelya kong ito. Maraming salamat po sa patuloy na pagtakilik. Oh siya eto na. May chika ako sa inyo and I promise, meron itong kwenta this time. hahahhaha



Kung inyong matatandaan, meron akong blog post na may pamagat na Love From A Man. I wrote it noong Feb 2016. Sa post na iyon naichika ko na naghahangad ako na magkakuya dahil naiinggit ako sa iba kasi meron sila samantalang ako, wala. Kung mare-recall niyo todo emote pa ako sa post na yun. hahahha Kaloka.

But now, I'm happy na sabihin sa inyo na meron na akong kuya. Finally! Yehey! Itago natin siya sa pangalang kuya Dar. Isang OFW. Sa Facebook ko siya nakilala. September 2016, panay ang comment ko sa isang fb page. Sakto nagco-comment din siya dun at nagre-reply din sa mga comments ko. Di nagtagal in-add niya ako sa fb. Gumawa siya ng group chat at sinali ako dun.


Kuya Dar

Usually tungkol sa paranormal stuffs ang topic namin dun. Minsan naman about sa buhay-buhay. At nabilib ako sa kanya dahil mahusay siyang magbigay ng advice. 7 years ang age gap namin pero para bang 200 years old na siya dahil sa wisdom na meron siya. Parang lolo nga eh. hahah Marami na daw kasi siyang napagdaanan sa buhay.

Up to now, hindi pa kami nagkikita at tanging sa chat lang nagkakausap, pero kahit ganon marami na siyang naituro sa akin.

Parang totoong kapatid na ang turing ko sa kanya, ganun din siya sa'kin. Minsan tinatawag niya akong sister kasi babae daw ang tingin niya sa'kin. Hahhaha sakto wala daw siyang kapatid na babae. Pero ang naging tawag niya talaga sa'kin ay Veks. From the word "beki", pinaglaruan ginawang "veki" hanggang mapunta sa "veks".

Ilang months pa lang ay naging close na agad kami. Gustong-gusto ko kapag may sine-share siyang wisdom sa amin. Pero one time, noong November 2016, nagbigay siya sa akin ng isang unsolicited advice tungkol sa pag-ibig na noong una ay hindi ko agad natanggap.

Heto ang sabi niya:

     Sana lang ay handa si Veks sa mundo ng pag-ibig dahil masalimuot ang mundo ng pag- ibig ng isang veks. Basta ito lang ang masasabi ko sa'yo kapatid,

“A relationship between a gay and a man will never work out." 

Yes... But a relationship between gays?? It would last a lifetime.

Cheer up. Maybe someday makapunta ka nang America diba?? Dito mo mahanap ang Mr. Right mo. Legal dito 'yan.
So don't be sad. You'll be happy someday.He must be gay para mag-work ang relationship. 

Dalawa lang ang pagpipilian. You can be super rich like Tito Boy Abunda. Or... sex change. "Katoi" in Thailand. 

Meron pang isang Paraan.We can make a contract to demon of lust. Nakalimutan ko na ang name ni Lust.. ahahahha Sisimulan ko na bang mag-drawing ng Solomon Circle?? Ahahaha 

Love is not the only reason to be happy, my sister. Maybe you can be a fairy? Or a mermaid. A BUTTERFLY SOMEDAY.. who knows? Hahahahaha 

Okay, serious na muna ako. When I was your age, 18-22 years old. I focused my self on love. I got relationship that last for 13 years (on and off). I got a lot of ex GFs and fuck buddies. 

But.... as i grow old veks, Love is just a centimeter of my kilometers problems.You know, you need to get a job to earn, bills to pay, health to maintain and mouths to feed.And soooner or later, you will die. 

After all... we're just HUMANS. So guys, don't focus your self on one thing. So enjoy this life and find its meaning. The end. 
Anyway... para sa kapatid kong babae ang puso. Hindi mo pa nakikita ang true love mo pero nakita mo naman ang true friends mo dito. True friends that act as your sisters and brothers. So... I hope happy ka jan."

-o-0O0-o-

Nang mabasa ko iyan, namuhi talaga ako sa kanya. Hindi ko siya kinausap nang ilang araw kasi nainis talaga ako. Naiyak ako for days. Masakit yung sinabi niya eh. Well, in denial pa kasi ako before. Dati kasi kabilang pa ako sa mga beki na umaasa na one day may isang istreyt na magmamahal sa tulad namin. Tipong nakulong sa pag-iilusyon ba.

Pero ngayon, natanggap ko na ang paliwanag niya. He's just concern. Bilang kuya, ayaw niya lang siguro na masaktan ako in the future. Tunay nga siyang kaibigan. Kakaunti lang ang kayang magsabi sa akin nang ganun ka-straightforward na salita.

For me, iyon ang pinaka-life changing na advice na natanggap ko. Kung hindi niya yun sinabi baka hanggang ngayon umaasa pa rin ako sa punyetang pag-ibig na talagang napakaimposible naman. May point naman siya. Tama yung sinabi niya na may mas importanteng bagay na dapat kong pagtuunan ng pansin kesa sa pag-ibig.

Besides, ano nga bang alam ko sa pag-ibig eh hindi pa naman ako nai-in love in my 22 years of existence. Wala na ata akong balak pa na maranasan 'yan. Hinihiling ko na sana hindi ako ma-in love dahil katangahan kapag nangyari iyon dahil nga ang umibig ay pointless.

Pasalamat talaga ako na binigyan ako ni kuya ng advice. Maganda ang naging resulta sa'kin dahil nawalan na ako ng interes sa pag-ibig. At least di na ako mai-in love, di na ako maha-heartbroken, di na ako made-depress tulad ng karamihan sa mga sawi sa pag-ibig.

Naisip niyo ba mga beks, sobrang bait natin sa mundo. Mapagmahal tayo. Pero ang mundo hindi naman tayo kayang pasayahin. Magmamahal tayo, pero hindi naman kayang suklian ang ating pagmamahal. Katangahan yun eh. Walang pagmamahal sa sarili. Kaya mga beks, wag na. Para sa akin to fall in love is a big NO.

Image from https://arachnidiscs.files.wordpress.com/2014/02/nolove2014.jpg

Sa ngayon pinag-aaralan ko pa kung paano isara ang heart ko. Na-realize ko na ang pinakamahahalagang pagmamahal sa mundo ay ang self love, love for God, and love for family. Yung romantic love, siguro for entertainment purposes only. Hahahaha

Di ko naman ikamamatay kahit walang love eh. Sana lang di ako ma-in love dahil walang magandang maidulot 'yan sa akin. Ang scenario lang naman sa buhay pag-ibig ng isang beki ay gan'to: Mai-inlab. Kikiligin. Sa una masaya pero sa huli masasaktan lang. Malulungkot. Made-depress hanggang sa pumangit at lumosyang. Hahhaha
Nah, ayokong maranasan iyan. OK na ako sa ganito. Pa-chill chill lang.


The Chemistry of Love. C8H11NO2+C10H12N2O+C43H66N12O12S2 dopamine, seratonin, oxytocin.
Image from http://static1.1.sqspcdn.com/static/f/803157/24811833/1398860711193/oxytocin_molecule.jpg

Tsaka medyo hindi na ako naniniwala sa romantic love dahil hormones lang ang may sanhi niyan just like any other emotions. At ang hormones, humuhupa. Gaya na lang ng pag-eemote ko dito dati. Jusko ang korny pala ng pinagsusulat ko before. hahaha So cringe worthy. Ang dami ko pang hanash sa pag-ibig noon eh noh kahit wala naman akong alam sa bagay na yun. Kaya from now on di ko na masyadong iisipin 'yan. I'm still learning on how to remove the idea of romantic love out of my life. Sa ngayon medyo bitter pa ako. Hoping ako na someday the idea of romantic love, it won't bother me anymore.

Oh siya dito ko na tinatapos ang chika ko for today. Any thoughts? Chikahan tayo sa comment box! It's been a long time since the last time na nagpalitan tayo ng mga kuro-kuro.


16 comments:

  1. Welcome back! Hoy wag ka na mawawala ulit ha! Kokonti na lang tayo dito sa blogosphere. Yung iba nawala na. Yung iba naging vlogger na.

    Daming hanash talaga pagdating sa pagibig. June pa naman. Buwan natin ito. Why would you run after straight guys? Hehehe! Makatanong ako, akala mo kung sino.

    Kahit ako, i fell for a straight guy. No, actually I am still in love with a straight guy. Bestfriend ko pa. Tanga tanga ko lang kasi. Hindi madali. Pero hindi ibig sabihin noon na dapat mong isara nang tuluyan ang puso mo sa pag-ibig. Happiness is just around the corner. Oo, kahit ako, hindi ko alam kung nasan yang putragis na around the corner na yan! Pero nandiyan lang yan.

    You're young. Don't waste your youth wallowing in depressing thoughts and circumstances. Choose to be happy. Easier said than done, but somehow you must do something about it.

    Anyway, hanggang dito na lang po. Wag ka na mawala. Balik ka lagi at update mo kami, kung sinu sinoman yung kami na yun... hehehe!

    Have a nice day!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ewan ko ba pero mas naa-attract ako sa istreyt eh. haha Never mind. Ayoko nang ma-attract sa kahit na sinong lalaki man 'yan o kahit sa babae pa. Uhm.. my goal is to be the first gay who did not fall in love in his lifetime. Wait? Am I still gay pag ganun? hahaha

    “Hindi madali. Pero hindi ibig sabihin noon na dapat mong isara nang tuluyan ang puso mo sa pag-ibig.”
    Oh please, don't tempt me to open my heart. ahahaha

    Regarding sa depressing thoughts, may mga times na nasa-sad pa rin ako. But I found out that hormones are the culprit for my mood changes. Finally, I have learned how to ignore those "senti" thoughts kasi it suddenly wears off naman.

    Anyway, thanks sa pag-welcome back. Pansin ko nga din na nawala na yung ibang bloggers. I promise na I'm still gonna post sa blog as long as I don't forget my blogger account's password and the internet still exists. I just don't know if gaano kadalas magpo-post. Hirap mag-isip ng hanash. Hehehe

    ReplyDelete
  3. Uyyy welcome back Beki. Miss your mga kudas and hanashes : )

    ReplyDelete
  4. Welcome Vak Veks! LOL. Tagal din ha.. And yang love? Ah ...ehh.... gutom lang yan...pa-deliver tayo sa jollibee? HAHAHA.

    Yang talagang koya-koya na yan eh....

    ReplyDelete
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